One way to get through grief

You cannot heal a lifetime of pain overnight.  Be patient with yourself. It takes –as long as it takes –to rebuild yourself. 

Perhaps you’ve heard the saying “Rome wasn’t built in a day”, or maybe the 12-step saying “You didn’t get here overnight.” All too often when we find ourselves down and discouraged we will do and try many things to feel better, sometimes this includes giving up. 

Whether we snap at people, become self-destructive by numbing out in addiction, become reckless in our behavior, or waste our lives in bed crying and avoiding life and the pain that comes with it… we are doing just that: avoiding life. 

Whatever is causing you distress has already been set in motion.  There is no erasing that. 

But you can choose this day on how you will live in dignity and in the solution. 

There is a time for grieving.  Give yourself time each day to really feel the discouragement, the depression, the hurt, and the pain.  Journal, listen to music that triggers your sad feelings and look at pictures of what once was.  Let yourself fully immerse yourself daily in these feelings for 1 hour; the same hour on the clock each day.  Then put away the journal, the music, the picture, and pack it up. Wipe your tears and tell yourself “I will be here for me again tomorrow.” And keep your word (commitment) to yourself daily. 

Then I encourage you to read something positive about life: God’s promises in the Bible.  Clear your mind by moving on to something uplifting. 

As the days go by you will look forward to this time of getting all the grief and sadness out. 

A wise woman once told me one of two things will happen.  Either, you will get to the point when you just know, on the inside, that you’ve done it enough, or, you will have developed a healthy way of getting through the pain of life while limiting it and not letting it take over more than 1 hour of your day.  The other twenty-three hours you will spend living life, forcing yourself to stay off the subject until the next day.  You will make progress and be responsible. 

The way you get through tough situations is a choice.  It really is. 

This is one way to honor your need to address the situation and still move on with life.  

Until Next Time~
Blessings, Kate

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